soul kiss

break my addictions

& be my cigarette

roll it up

kill it off

take it away

with every grip

i grow more obsessed

(my valium)

every sound & reverb

every raw detail your voice projects

into me

out of lust

i want to refine you in white

maybe pink

and pop you like a pill

take you when i'm down

or on magic hill

so tell me, about myself.

the girl who visions ripping her self to pieces at a sight of a mirror

the girl who will die of insecurity

the girl sitting next to you

the girl who's diagnosed & patiently waiting for a cure

the girl by the phone

the sister that tries to create a satisfying impression

the daughter that hides depression

the student that struggles

the poet that writes about her pain

the teenager thats bottling up her tears

the stranger that walks by, with suicide crossing her mind

the one who is alone

the person living in shame

the one who's only asking for someone

to care.

i can't

but i fell in love

with the wrong person

at the wrong time

& as he left

he took it

he forgot to leave my heart behind

i told you; i'm not good enough

its friday

heavy dose of nicotine - pain killers - empty journals

17

where we go

lips interlocking

stains, black orchid stains

with every touch

soft movements across

his flesh

with every physical contact

like adrenaline, creeping in my veins

who knows?