& thats why i love you.

for a small moment i felt high on the stardust & magic that diffuses from his eyes and from his blissful soul. 

then just like that i was snapped back to what is reality.

&

then i remembered that the reality that is sitting right in front of me is my euphoric state of mind .

& that this reality 

is the perfect combination 

of what i called " junction & perfection"

& that all this is not a dream

this is a reality 

i feel him. 

i always thought that i was a prisoner to everyones eyes, a prisoner of all sorts. 

especially a prisoner of colors 

a prisoner in which everyone could tell me what to do

& because of my fragile self 

i would do as they please 

and take what they give me 

& lock it up inside. 

but then i remembered him

and how he was right in front of me 

and i felt 

free

content 

whole 

loved. 

on this night where the sky was as liquidly as ever 

and the stars shined like no other. 

i fell into the beauty of everything i saw, the sky and how is seems as though 

god spilled blue ink all over & the stars shined and sparkled 

like they never have before. 

i felt indifferent & cold by the smoke thats coming out of his cigarette 

and i felt his beauty sink in between my bones. 

& then i became aware of the fact that this moment right here 

i have a friend. 

finally i don't feel alone with someone 

i feel whole with that one person

imperfection 

makes everything seem perfect. 

i will no longer wonder those useful thoughts. 

i will try making alone not seem lonely anymore 

because i can say to myself that i have my own haze of blue 

and that color is around me 

day & night 

my own tint of blue.